Social networks – good only for narcissism?
Are social networking sites only good for promoting narcissism? A recent Chicago Tribune article seems to suggest so. The author writes:
The comments and exchanges share the same superficial qualities, all penned with the expectation that hundreds of eyes will see them, like the perfectly manicured—and bland—lawns in a neighborhood run by a draconian homeowners association.
I cringe at this one-dimensional presentation. I cringe at the willful relinquishment of privacy. I cringe at status updates, those self-important, lazy public diaries. Why someone needs to know that a friend in Chicago plans to “greet you with a ‘yo’” is beyond me. It seems the arc of Facebook clearly bends toward narcissism.
I have to admit that I agree with some of his points, as I have no good reasons for some of the things that people write about and share with their networks. Many of the things that are shared by some people should not be communicated to anyone – never mind dozens or hundreds of acquaintances- not because they are offensive but because they are inane. However, I don’t agree with his conclusion that social networks deliver little value and should be shunned. With a bit of discretion regarding what gets communicated, a situational approach to the use of various social networks, and the use of an admittedly heavy personal filter on what I read from the posts of others, I get a good amount of value from various social networking sites.
Here are the ones I use and how I use them.
LifeSnapz – I use Lifesnapz for communication with family members and close friends. (Yes, my choice is no coincidence, but no matter). With LifeSnapz, I can share my family’s important (and even not so important) events with the people I care about in near real-time. And I can do this in an environment where I control who can see and participate in my groups, so I don’t feel like I am compromising my privacy by broadcasting my life across the web for anyone to see. My parents who live in Massachusetts (my family and I live in Illinois) can see the videos and pictures and read descriptions of their grandsons’ weekend hockey games or their granddaughter’s birthday party. These are important events to them, but likely not to my professional contacts or my acquaintances. LifeSnapz has enabled a deeper relationship between my family and my parents, and LifeSnapz provides everyone involved a way to communicate in the context of these events. My kids love to hear regularly from their Grammy and Grampy. Despite the distance, their relationships are deeper with my kids because they know more about them, and the connections happens more regularly. Also with LifeSnapz, my out-of-town friends can keep up with my family in a way that no end-of-the-year letter or holiday update could ever match (and there is no awkwardness that invariably comes with one of these letters). Additionally, LifeSnapz gives me an organized record and timeline of my (and my family’s) life, sort of a digital scrapbook that is easy to maintain. Keeping strong relationships (offline, online or some combination) takes time, and I choose to spend the bulk of my social networking time with my family and closest friends.
LinkedIn – I use LinkedIn for professional networking. With LinkedIn, I can keep up with my professional contacts, research people with whom I will be meeting, find out who knows who at companies with which I am trying to connect, post job openings and get answers or guidance when I am looking for information related to my job or industry. There are many things that I don’t share on LinkedIn because they are not relevant or appropriate in a professional setting. Overall, I find LinkedIn to be highly useful as a professional networking tool. It makes me more productive and knowledgeable at work.
Facebook – I use Facebook for general networking. Frankly, with Facebook I don’t expect much. I like to share articles and interesting posts on Facebook, and I like to receive (selectively) what others have posted. I block out and skip much of what my “Friends” tell me they are doing now, and I have not spent a lot of time exploring FB’s applications. I like the efficiency of Wall-to-Wall communication, and I like the discovery nature of reconnecting with (some) people from my past. After all, there are a lot of people who really like Facebook and use it as their primary mode of communication. In most of these reconnecting experiences unfortunately, I find that the relationship doesn’t extend much further than the initial reconnect. Overall, I think Facebook is entertaining but only marginally useful for me.
Twitter – Twitter is an interesting and rapidly growing social network, and I am still trying to decide how useful it is for me. I have been able to find some interesting people to follow (nearly all who are in my industry), and I have come across some interesting posts and references that have been tweeted. I like the brevity of the interactions, both as a contributor and a consumer. I like some of the tools that have sprung up around Twitter (especially search.twitter.com) as they are helpful in keeping up with real-time tweets about topics of interest. Like Facebook, many people use Twitter as their primary communication tool, so if I want to connect with them I need to be there. I am a regular user of Twitter and an occasional contributor (2 – 3 times per week). For me though, the jury’s still out on Twitter.
So my advice in a nutshell: use social networking sites selectively and purposefully, and remember to be aware of who is on the receiving end of your posts and contributions.
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